Funny & Sarcastic Poems/Lyrics

Funny Hockey Poem – You Don’t Have to Stink to be Good!

Filed in Funny & Sarcastic Poems/Lyrics, Sports Poetry by on May 1, 2009 0 Comments • views: 0
Funny Hockey Poem – You Don’t Have to Stink to be Good!

A Hockey Poem:
Is the incredible stink of hockey equipment a badge of toughness, of working hard…well here’s a poem to put this one away.

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Too Deep

Too Deep

Poem, Joke: Alright, I wrote this as a joke for my husband. He finds my poetry too deep, so I decided to dedicate this “simple” poem to him. Ha! Ok, he laughed. I mean really! when I have to create a grade school poem for the hubster to appreciate it…I give up. Not. So this is for the man of my dreams *ahem*.

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The Honey Do List Gone Wild for Unemployed Men!

Filed in Funny & Sarcastic Poems/Lyrics by on April 29, 2009 0 Comments • views: 0
The Honey Do List Gone Wild for Unemployed Men!

Wash the damn car Seal the driveway Clean the air filters Empty the vacuum bag Cut the frigging grass Organize the garage Paint See that chair, don’t sit in it. The dishes are piling up, let’s get ‘er done. But wait, it’s raining, get the clothes off the line, FAST. Look in the fridge, what […]

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Since My Family Never Reads My Poetry

Filed in Funny & Sarcastic Poems/Lyrics, Funny Family Poetry by on April 27, 2009 0 Comments • views: 0
Since My Family Never Reads My Poetry

I’m gonna tell you all their wicked little secrets wait til you hear this stuff *rubs hand in evil twist*.. I mean, since I don’t have to worry about them ever finding…THIS WEB PAGE! Payback’s a bee-ouch. You won’t believe what your eyes are about to smell hold on to your suntans and get ready, […]

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Packin’ In My Dreams

Packin’ In My Dreams

45 years behind me I’m startin’, reachin’ for the dream I left my front porch crying Only tears of fear Then wiped my face To keep it crystal clear Your too old You’ll unfold They’ll laugh at your attempt Get back in the house! Cook a meal !! Don’t continue. Check the menu. The kids […]

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It’s A Bird

It’s A Bird

Look up in the sky, “It’s a bird”, So what. “It has no wings!” Are you sure? “Yah, look, look, he only has a body and an orange beak!”, Hey you’re right. “He’s trying to say something, can you hear him?”, Wait, listen, I do hear him. “What’s he saying!” He’s telling me something, “What, […]

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Held Hostage By Curls

Held Hostage By Curls

Held Hostage by Curls: Being a Curly Top all my life, and lover of the flat iron, I have finally come to terms with my locks. So there you have it, poetry about curly hair, and quite personal to my life as well. Held Hostage by Curls One protruding curl adorned her head till two, […]

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Give Me A Loan Today

Give Me A Loan Today

Give Me A Loan Today:: A “loaner moaner” tale with a happy ending, and lessons of responsible borrowing learned. Give Me A Loan Today! When he borrowed money yesterday afternoon his wife cheered, “we’ll get that new car pretty soon!” They danced in a circle then fell to the floor “hey maybe they can loan […]

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Fat Loss

Filed in Funny & Sarcastic Poems/Lyrics by on April 24, 2009 0 Comments • views: 2
Fat Loss

Poem about Fat Loss! – Kiss your butt goodbye, poetically speaking… This is a loss I will accept goodbye to fat without regret turns-out all is not okay, as I heard a voice in the distance say, “hey you!, yah you, where’s our wiggle, we don’t bounce, sag, or jiggle!” “Who’s that” I asked completely […]

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Don’t Take My Flipper Away

Filed in Funny & Sarcastic Poems/Lyrics, Funny Family Poetry by on April 24, 2009 0 Comments • views: 0
Don’t Take My Flipper Away

Poem, Sarcasm: Ok ladies I wrote this for you!..This is for every woman who suffers from “LOATTRC” (lack of access to the remote control). Actually, I was thinking about my father and mother and my husband and myself, and how control of the “remote” usually becomes sole possession of the “male” in the house! Statistics […]

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Buy Me The Easter Bunny

Filed in Funny & Sarcastic Poems/Lyrics by on April 24, 2009 0 Comments • views: 0
Buy Me The Easter Bunny

Easter Bunny Poem – Funny home videos are a click away Easter Poem: An Easter Bunny Tale between Mother and Son The magnificent art of my six year old son Read, “Mom I know you can get this job done” “Easter is coming, but don’t buy me a toy” He said, “forget about candy, I’m […]

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Kiss My Assets

Kiss My Assets

Another collaboration of work – Written by me (Barbara Tremblay Cipak (aka Drageda) and Elvis Proctor)- It’s a sarcastic country song about a guy who couldn’t get a girl, was ignored and laughed at..until he won the lottery: The Lyrics are below and the video created to it is above, take a listen! If you’re […]

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