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I Won’t Let Go – A Song Dedication

Dad, You’re Gone Eleven Months Now, at the Time of Writing This – Originally Written in February 2014

I’m having a lot of trouble dealing with the fact that you’re not here. When I cry, I think of the words to this song, ‘I Won’t Let Go, by Rascal Flatts’..they comfort me. As the words play, I imagine you in spirit form beside me, holding me up when it’s too tough to take, telling me you won’t let go, that you’ll stand by me, that you’re here.

How come the world just keeps going without you in it? Doesn’t the world know what’s lost? Your humor, your toughness, your fairness, but mostly the incredible love you gave to all of us.

Dad, do you know how many people came to me and said, ‘your dad was like a father to me?’ – that was you Dad, father to many, even those who weren’t your family by blood.

Dad, I think back to how selfless you were, you loved us unconditionally, and I want to scream it from a mountain! The world will never really know, I guess. You no longer live when we live. What hurts Dad, what hurts the most is knowing my grandkids will never know the incredible father I had, and the incredible great grandfather they had.

The words say it so well, ‘it’s like a storm that cuts a path’ you think you’re lost, but you’re not lost on your own, you’re not alone.’

Dad, please stay. Please don’t let go. I worry about you on the other side. Of course, I know you’re ok, but that’s not good enough! I know how scared you were to lose us; I understood the depth of your love. You told us all the time. I wish you could just call me and say, “Barb, I’m ok,” you don’t have to worry about me, I’m right here, beside you. I’m happy, Barb, don’t worry about me. I’m not scared, Barb. THESE are the WORDS I need to hear. I’ve even searched for you on the internet when I just didn’t know what to do.

To honor my father, every month for a year, I am posting a song dedication as well as something written from my heart, it can be found here.

Grief is a pretty tough thing to deal with. To all of you who have suffered a loss like this, my sincere condolences. A loss this deep, this close is fortunately only really felt when you go through it. My heart is with each of you. It’s a terrible club to be a member of. Blessings to you.

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