25 Funny Things to Write In a Mothers Day Card

Filed in Sayings - Original by Drageda, What to Write on Card by Barbara Tremblay Cipak on May 4, 2014 • 0 Comments • views: 13511

Mom has a sense of humor and looks forward to a card with a snappy comment every year; if this sounds like your mom, then you’ve come to the right place! Here you’ll find silly and sarcastic things to write in mom’s card.

Yes, I’ve personally written these, but go ahead and change them up to suit your personality! Add them to an already humorous personal card, or just get a blank Mothers Day card and write one of these sayings inside of it!

25 Funny Things to Write In a Mothers Day Card

You are the luckiest mom in the world, because apparently I was slotted to go to another mother before I was born but because I pitched such a fit about their choice, they decided you should be my mom! See, you almost didn’t get this card…thank goodness I’m a spoiled brat right!
Some moms are classy, some moms are brassy, some moms are even a bit rashy (usually a little penicillin will fix that), but you mom, are just the right mix of trashy and sassy…I like to think of you as Strashy.
Mommy, don’t listen to other people, I am perfect.
Mothers day is a time we thank god for all the moms on the planet and of course it’s also a windfall for the card companies and florists – Showing you some love and supporting our local stores, that’s what mothers day is all about..right??
You deserve a trip to Antigua, but unfortunately I also deserve a better job…never the two shall meet
If I could get you anything, it would be 3 wishes and if you wanted to re-gift it back to me, go ahead!
If God took an ounce of everything sweet on this planet, it would make you…of course it would also make some dentist rich too! You’re too sweet for your own good!
Sunshine and Roses..that’s what I got you for Mothers Day..and you wouldn’t believe who I had to sleep with to get the Sunshine! No.No.No. it was just a scientist in Tuktoyaktuk!!!!
So you think you deserve a card, a hug, a dinner, a smile, and a lot of love – well you were never known to be stupid
When they were handing out the brains they gave them all to me because I picked you to be my mother! I’m a genius.
Mothers Day is about you, but it doesn’t matter how you slice the pie, I’ll always be the apple in it!
Today is your day; turn up the music, dance on the table, drink a bottle of wine…just PLEASE keep your clothes on….well at least the heels!
In a world of disarray there you are making everything right…with your margaritas, your credit cards, and your giving nature – thanks for the margarita and I’ll get your card back to you by tomorrow :), Mom’s rule.
Today is all about you, so don’t you dare do anything for us; unless you want to bake that nice little number that I love, or redecorate my bedroom…NO, don’t even do that. I must be suffering from a head injury or something?
Moms who golf are competitive with themselves, moms who play tennis want to beat the crap out of their opponent, looks like you’re really a tennis player at heart – minus the tennis.
So you’re my mother – out of all the mothers in the world, you’re the one that turned out to be my mother…well well well…aren’t YOU the lucky one!
I go out of my way for you because if I didn’t you’d become this really intolerable hard to live with person that makes me pull my hair out…but that’s what I love about you most 🙂
You are the hope in my heart, the song in my heart and the life in my heart – corny enough yet??? you know I love you, you don’t need these cheesy quotes to let you know!
Choose one word to describe your mother – kagasalap – Here I’ll use it in a sentence for you “My mother is the most kagasalp of all moms” – Kind and generous and smart and loving and perfect..Kagasalap.
If I could bottle you I’d make a fortune
You are an original and I am the sequel of the original – I think that makes me the ‘spin-off’??
You have no idea how tired I am of hearing how great my mother is! My friends go on about you like you were some sort of saint! It’s annoyingly wonderful. Thanks for being perfect!
So yesterday I checked my schedule, it was full…but I cancelled everything because I knew if I didn’t you’d have my head! My kind of mom.
You are tough, you are fair, your are awesome, your are amazing, I talk too much, exaggerate slightly and have often been called delusional … ignore that last part.
So today is the day we celebrate you; I guess the world doesn’t know that you’re a Diva and we in fact, celebrate you everyday – it’s in our contract to be your kid!